The Cottage

For as long as I can remember, Cumberland Point has been part of the landscape of my childhood. My grandparents acquired the little red farmhouse on Cumberland Point Road when my mom was a child and the family lived in Fredericton. It was already over a hundred years old at the time, and was sold to them by Burtis MacLean, who had purchased it from Archie Reese, who was born there. My parents bought it just before Grandpa passed away, to keep it in the family.

Year after year, we would arrive at the cottage road-worn but happy, to be greeted by hugs and kisses from Grandma and Grandpa Bourassa. We would wake up every morning to the smell of coffee and a bowl of Grandpa’s porridge, then curl up on the Nest to thumb through an old Reader’s Digest for the hundredth time (RD’s from 1995 can still be found on the bookshelf above the Nest). Sometime mid-morning we would make our way to the beach, often staying there all day. Grandpa always had projects on the go, with which my dad helped, and Grandma and Mom looked after meals, which were copious, but we kids spent our days playing. I was always happy when Grandma and Grandpa would come down to the beach, Grandma in her swimsuit and sunglasses and Grandpa in his trunks and unbuttoned Hawaiian t-shirt. I liked knowing that they were taking some time to relax and enjoy the afternoon sun. Sometimes we would have lunch on the beach – I remember one meal during which Baby Leah discovered that sand could be a yummy topping for crackers!

After dinner we would often light a bonfire by the beach, roast marshmallows, and sing songs we learned from Grandma and Grandpa, huddling closer and closer to the fire as the night got cooler. On other nights, we would sit around the table, playing cards and eating popcorn. Sometimes I would lie awake in bed listening to the comforting sound of rain on the tin roof, but most often I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. Deep and restorative sleep was a given at the cottage.

Things happen much the same way now as they did then. Grandpa passed away in 2007, and Grandma hasn’t been to the cottage since their last trip together, but I always think of them when I’m there – as I suspect we all do. I can still see nearly eighty-year-old Grandpa on the roof of his shed, working intently, my dad alongside him praying he wouldn’t fall. My dad now follows in Grandpa’s footsteps, seeming to enjoy his holiday all the more when there are jobs to be done.

One of this year's jobs

There are always lots of people at the cottage. Our family alone makes for a good-sized group, and we are often joined by friends, either spending their holidays there or just passing through. This year Liam and I were there with my parents and three brothers, as well as Leah and Chris. Brendan had to go back to work after our time with his family, and the Genest’s had their holiday before ours, but everyone is hoping that next summer will find us all there at once. There’s something about being at the cottage together that strengthens family bonds – perhaps it’s all the time we spend playing and talking and enjoying each other’s company, away from the things that demand attention in our respective homes. The cottage houses many fond memories for all of us and being back every summer reminds us of shared laughs and meaningful moments.

This year's Clampet picture, before B left (taken by Dad)

The first of many rounds of Settlers of Catan

The Nest

Pat learning to water ski

For me, the best part of being at the cottage this year was seeing Liam enjoy the place I grew up loving. After having gotten used to the beach in Aylmer and at Bay du Vin, he felt immediately at home on Grand Lake. He also enjoyed swimming with his special new floatie (which I would highly recommend to any parents of toddlers!). He seemed very confident in the water and swam all the way out to the raft with me several times. When he wasn’t on the beach, he was playing up at the cottage, running around with his auntie and uncles and lapping up floods of affection. 

I’m so glad that summers at Cumberland Point will begin to populate the memories of my children, marking milestones and defining life’s chapters, as they have for me. 

Cousins

Miss Eloise is a tall and willowy two-year-old with beautiful doe eyes that drink in the world in great gulps. They are luminous, vividly displaying her precocious nature. 

Last summer she wasn’t sure about the bald headed intruder who came to distract the attention of her Mom and Nana. At Christmas, she seemed much more interested in Baby, and enjoyed riding with him in her new red wagon. Her parents tell us she talked about him for months afterwards. Although she knew many other babies, “Baby” had found a special place in her heart. This year Lee-mam and Eloise have become friends. Yesterday they played with trains and blocks and Buster (Eloise’s dog, whom Liam calls Freya, naturally). Eloise showed Liam how she dances in her living room and taught him how to kick down block castles. “Make a castle!” she said. So I did. When it was done, she gracefully thrust her dainty little foot into it. “Eloise kick it down!” she exclaimed triumphantly. Liam laughed. Later that evening, at David & Peggy’s, Peggy made a block castle for Liam. As soon as it was standing, out came the foot, down came the castle!

That's a hug, not a headlock. 

Eloise's camera smile

One of my favourite parts of watching Liam and Eloise together is seeing their dads get right into the mix. Both Brendan and Owen are exceedingly proud of their children and have leapt into fatherhood with great gusto. Brendan becomes like a kid himself around his little guy, mirroring Liam’s delight in games like Jumping on the Bed, Dancing on the Couch, or Running Like a Wild Thing All Through the House (all these games have a certain Daddy-esque quality with which Mommy sometimes feels compelled to interfere – but usually tries to restrain herself. As long as no one is getting hurt, I guess it’s ok!) Owen is equally exuberant in his interaction with Eloise. He is the definition of a Fun Dad, and I suspect that his little girl has just as much of a soft spot in her heart for Daddy as there is in his for her. Watching the four of them laughing and rolling around on the attic bed yesterday made me look forward to meeting the new cousins who will be joining the family in the coming years. It’s exciting to think of how these little people will shape our lives, teach us new roles, and make us into better versions of ourselves.

Holidays in New Brunswick

We drove to New Brunswick on Friday, August 3^rd, arriving in Fredericton around 3am. On Saturday, after a morning visit from Owen & Caleb, we headed to the market – Brendan’s Saturday morning samosa & donair run is mandatory whenever we’re in town. That afternoon we drove out to Burnt Church, where we met Bill & Susan. Liam was happy to see his Nana & Papa – as expected, Mom & Dad immediately took the back seat!

Blowing bubbles with Uncle Caleb on Saturday morning

Brendan and Bill played in the annual Burnt Church golf tournament on Sunday, and the whole community gathered for a potluck dinner in the evening. It was a nice opportunity to meet some of the folks from around the area, many of whom had grown up spending their summers in Burnt Church (as had Susan’s family).

On Monday morning, we made our way to the Marshall cottage at Bay du Vin, where we stayed until Friday. Bill & Susan joined us there later in the day and we spent the afternoon enjoying the sunshine and sandbars. Liam loves the beach, and though he’s a bit leery of seaweed (read: cries whenever a piece of it touches his foot), he still had fun playing in the sand and pouring water from one bucket to another.

That evening, Nana & Papa spent some quality time with their boy while Brendan and I went into town for dinner and a movie. We don’t get out on dates very often, so it was nice to spend the evening together.

Bill & Susan went back to Burnt Church on Tuesday evening, and on Wednesday, we were joined by Rob and Ole, and Toby and his nephew, Sam (who is just a few months older than Ole). They stayed two nights, leaving just before we did on Friday. We had a great couple of days. The little guys played really well together, and all three of them had naps and slept through the night – a winning combination! A highlight for the munchkins was the neighbour’s trampoline. They just couldn’t get enough! It was cute to see them running around in circles, bouncing each other up and down – and miraculously avoiding injury!

A stay at the cottage is never complete without a game of Ultimate Croquet. The 2012 edition took place on Thursday afternoon. The three big guys challenged each other on the course, little ones in tow, and me behind the camera. Brendan won the game and gloated for the rest of the day. He’s humble like that.

Friday morning was spent packing and cleaning to the soundtrack of Thomas and Friends and The Carebears. It was raining, so the babes had to stay inside – not the most fun thing to do at the cottage, but they held up all right. About half an hour before we were ready to go (the others had left by this time), Liam decided it was time to put his shoes on and get in the car. So on went the shoes, and out went the boy to stand by the car and wait. And there he stood, waiting for a good 30 minutes until Mom & Dad were finally ready. For an almost two-year-old, he has an amazing amount of patience and determination (probably mixed in with a healthy dose of stubbornness, if he’s anything like his parents!).

Dellica had been working while Rob and Ole were with us at the cottage, so we invited them all over for dinner in Fredericton on Friday evening. We took the boys to Queen Square after dinner, where they played on the jungle gym and Liam looked longingly at the pool. We told him we’d go back the next day, but today has been rainy and cool – fortunately he has a short memory (for the time being, at least!).

We did make it to the market this morning, despite the rain. No weather can keep Brendan from his samosas and donairs! Toby joined us this time and stayed for a short visit afterwards. We’re off to Owen & Amy’s for dinner this evening so that the cousins can play together. I’m hoping to get some good shots of the two of them!

Mom's Birthday Surprise

My mom is turning 50 on Christmas Day. Because 50 is important, and Mom’s birthday is always overshadowed by Christmas festivities, we decided to celebrate a month early this year. Sometime in the summer, Jessica emailed the rest of her siblings with an idea for celebrating our mom in a special way. She suggested sending Mom and Dad to the Nordic Spa for the day, and then greeting them back home with a gourmet dinner. We all thought it was a fantastic idea, and so the planning began.

Dad took the day off on Friday, saying that it had been a busy week at work. Mom knew that he’d be home but had no idea how the day would unfold. They dropped Patrick off at Jessica’s in the morning, went out for breakfast, and then took off to a mystery destination. Mom guessed where they were going as they approached and immediately burst into tears. Dad told her then that this day had been planned for her by her kids as a birthday gift. More tears flowed.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, preparations were underway for the surprise dinner. Jess, Leah, Chris, and I spent the day cleaning house and preparing food. Chris’ mom Carolyn also joined us, and treated us to a yoga class in the afternoon. By the end of our rejuvenating yoga session, all the troupes had gathered: Mike and Dan were home from school, Patrick had returned from playing at a friend’s house, and Brendan and Joel were back from work. Excitement was in the air, especially after Dad called saying they were on their way home. Mom still had no idea that we were all waiting for her – she had taken a casserole out of the freezer for dinner (which Leah promptly put back in the freezer) but on Dad’s suggestion, decided they would order Chinese instead. As they drove home from the spa, we got dressed up, put the final touches on the appetizer spread and set out the salad plates. Patrick was our watchman – when he announced they were coming up the driveway, we all hid in the stairwell leading to the basement (right off the kitchen) – well, all except Liam who was in his highchair enjoying the early sitting of the meal.

After Mom had taken in the beautifully set table and spread of appetizers, we jumped out of our hiding place and smothered her with hugs. Everyone was thrilled that the surprise had actually worked! We gave Mom and Dad a moment to get dressed for the occasion, toasted the lady of the hour, and began the feast.

(As an aside, on the topic of getting dressed up: my dad resisted a bit, asking – with an impish grin – what was wrong with the outfit he had on. He was wearing jeans and a shirt we call “The Shirt,” because it gets so much play. “This is a nice shirt!” he argued. Yes, we agreed it was a nice shirt (“we” being my sisters and I – the guys didn’t care), but suggested that he change into something he doesn’t wear so often. So he reluctantly went upstairs, emerging from his room a few moments later wearing the same shirt in a different colour. He did it, of course, to make us laugh – which we did.)   

Dinner was in five courses, beginning with appetizers, followed by salad, soup, an entrée of roast beef and vegetables, and topped with a dessert of raspberry pie and whipped cream, chai tea and chocolates, all homemade. It was a succulent affair – a true delight to the senses. The best part, though, was being together, and seeing how happy we had made our mom.

After dinner we sat in the living room and played music, which we love to do when we’re together. The evening ended with words of appreciation for Mom from each of us – we call this “the Blessing Cup.” At Dad’s 50^th, we passed around the Blessing Cup and spoke of our love and respect for him, so we thought it appropriate to do the same for Mom. Everything shared was heartfelt and moving (naturally, Mom burst into tears as soon as the first words were uttered), but the crowning speech was given by Dad: “I could not have imagined this,” he said, gesturing to his children, sons-in-law, and grandchildren. “This was your vision. You have enriched my life so much.” Since getting married myself, I have come to treasure even more the expression of love I see exchanged between my parents. This was a privileged moment and I felt honoured to be a witness. 

Everyone slept over that night, even the Genest’s, who live five minutes away. The next day we ate leftovers and talked about the day before. It felt like Christmas. Mom told me a couple days ago that she still can’t believe we did that for her. I can tell she loved it, because I know my mom is genuine, but also because whenever we’re with people who don’t know the story, she just can’t wait to tell them all about it! She says it’s a happy memory that will stay with her for a long time. And that, for us, is a success.

Mom & Dad with their kids (and Liam, who will not tolerate being separated from his grandma)
Michael, Jessica, Dad, me, Mom, Daniel, Leah, Patrick & Liam

With Leah's husband, Chris (Patrick was having a hard time smiling in these pictures)

With Jessie's husband Joel, Baby Anna, and Brendan
(and finally, a smile from Pat - probably laughing because Liam is swatting him!)

First Snow

Yesterday was our first Ottawa snowfall. Since Liam was too little last year to care about weather, I was eager to introduce him to the snow yesterday. I dressed him up around mid-morning – he looked hilariously cute. I enjoyed a good solo laugh as he stomped around the house in his giant blue suit and new winter boots (at moments like that, I really wish another adult were around to enjoy with me the humour of the situation!). I was hoping Liam would be intrigued by the snow, but he seemed unimpressed. He noticed it, and tasted it, but was more interested in trying to run towards the road. Our dog Freya was far more excited about the snow than Liam was. She ran, rolled, and did her strange bucking maneuvers (which Brendan calls rodeo jumps), enjoying herself thoroughly. Liam got a kick out of Freya’s antics, as he usually does.

We came in after a short time of walking around outside (mostly Liam walking toward the road and me carrying him away from it), and I had a happy feeling of anticipation as I imagined the day when my little boy and I would actually play outside, and come in with rosy cheeks, to clutch mugs of hot chocolate, and wipe runny noses without crying. One day. But I’m certainly not wishing Liam to grow up any faster than he is. My baby is almost 15 months old and already looking like such a big boy:

I’ve noticed a marked increase in his development in the last month. He calls the dog by her name, which he pronounces, “Vey,” and says “num-num” almost constantly (this boy loves to eat!). He is remarkably agile and is an adept runner and climber. He’s also very curious, and enjoys opening cupboards and spreading their contents all over the floor. He loves books and has the endearing habit of climbing into my lap to read stories. I rarely get through the whole book before he’s on to the next thing, but even a five second story time cuddle is nice (especially now that he’ll actually look at the book without smashing it with both hands, as was his former way). 

Stealing a kiss before he runs away!

He is an unabashed Blankie Boy, and although Blankie rarely leaves the house, it follows Liam nearly everywhere while we’re home. If he happens to forget about Blankie while engrossed in something else – a toy, or a book, or a kitchen utensil – he usually recognizes his oversight and goes to fetch his friend. I had made up my mind before Liam was born that I didn’t want to foster an attachment to a big dirty stinky blanket, but alas – the blanket won. I try to wash it often, but it’s still covered in dog hair most of the time (come to think of it, nearly everything in this house is covered in dog hair most of the time…).

Liam's favourite perch - notice Blankie at his feet

The weather forecast says eleven degrees on Saturday, so it doesn’t look like this first snow will last. That’s ok though – it’s still early. There will be plenty more snowfalls in the coming months and many opportunities for Liam to enjoy his first Canadian winter – maybe some of Freya’s enthusiasm for the season will rub off on him!

Proverbs 31

The first reading at Mass today was from Proverbs 31:

“A good wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.

The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.

She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.

She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.

She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.

She opens her hand to the poor, and reaches out her hands to the needy.

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.”

After the reading, Brendan whispered to me: “That describes you! Especially the part about working with flax!” I had to stifle my “this-is-not-an-appropriate-time-to-be-laughing” laughter for a good couple of minutes. He said this because I’ve recently become obsessed with healthy food, and flax is one of the new additions to our diet. I think he also said it just to make me laugh.

Although I was honoured by my husband’s praise (because it was a compliment, flax joke aside!), I know that becoming the Proverbs 31 woman is a long journey. She is trustworthy, noble, hard working, generous, faithful to God and to her family – when I think of this woman, I imagine someone with great strength of character who does not back away from challenges, but meets them courageously, unafraid to give of herself for the good of others. When I was a teenager I noticed that my mom would never sit down to dinner until everyone else had what they needed. If there was not enough of something to go around, she would be the one to go without. I remember assuming that this kind of generosity was part of motherhood. When you’re a mom, you give. In my teenage way, I thought this was something you just grow into spontaneously. My mom’s self-giving seemed so effortless that I figured it was just something that came naturally when you assumed the responsibility of looking after other people. Now that I’m a wife and mother myself, I realize that generosity, even when it comes naturally, is not always effortless. I don’t think the Proverbs 31 woman just woke up one morning ready for the task of caring for a husband and children, working at her craft to provide for her family, feeding the poor, honouring the Lord in everything she does – she had to work at these virtues. And although the idea of so much hard work can be daunting at times, it’s encouraging to think that with effort (and grace, of course), we can become the people we want to be. Every small decision I make to be generous, to work hard, to meet the needs of others, molds me into the kind of woman I want to be. A woman like the wife in Proverbs 31 – a woman like my own mother.